justrun-.

insomnia. again

cannot get to bed... sigh. icing my hips now. two ice packs, one on each side. feels a little odd. i've been icing so much but yet the pain isn't getting better or beginning to go away. what shall i do..

tried stretching it. my usual favourite most effective rectus femoris stretch. and OMG. it was like someone had just jabbed a knife into the muscle. each time i try, i end up wincing in pain and losing balance.

okay i don't know WHY i am putting this down here. not a good idea. but heck. i'm super . whatever-ed right now.

i need to calm down... seriously. it's not the end of the world. it's not the end of the world. it's not the end of the world.

okay i'm scared to go to bed also cos i might get another freaky nightmare. my nightmares are getting pretty grotesque. last time i got shot in the back. could virtually feel two bullets dug deep into my back. then recently i got pierced by large pieces of glass. quite visual eh...

i seriously think i'm going to die of tiredness in sch tmr. but oh well... really cannot sleep. you see, when i can't settle my thoughts i can't sleep. i don't know exactly what i'm going to do about things now... yeah sure ideas popping up here and there. nothing concrete yet though and that makes me uneasy!

i miss running without pain. i miss a lot of things. blahhhhh

wasting time here.... senseless rants.

why can't you replace muscles like you replace batteries :(

i want to train different now. but i can't even walk. ahhh! terror. tell me how the hell do you not worry about these things?!?! breathe pat breathe... omg this is scary. what if my muscles have totally like degenerated and are all destroyed and they can never recover! then i can't run forever.

AHHHH. i sound like i'm going mad. pretty much have actually.

alskfjaksjdfklajwksdkj. muscles. darnit.

[pat]* decided to runaway-.

put on her shoes at [23:43]

and took [20050707] strides

it's the passion that drives you